Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Breakdown...Breakthrough?

Morning came with another headache... next - food, vitamins, water, juice, headache medicine followed by resting in bed.

The scary part followed many hours later - come the afternoon, after I woke her for lunch and she ate, put her food and tray away...and went back to her room. Later, I could hear her walking upstairs so I went to check in.

I came up the stairs and could see through the door - Gma - sitting at the edge of her bed, slightly shivering, and completely disoriented. She looked very small.

"...you ok?" I asked gently - not wanting to scare her from the strange gaze I saw.

In a voice so small she said - "no. What happened??? What am I doing sitting here?? What have I been doing?? How long have I been here??" - she asked with huge tears welling in her eyes and a full body quiver.

"I'm scared" she weakly said - "what is wrong with me?" and I quickly caught her frail body as she slumped into my shoulders burying her head to hide.

She didn't know anything that had happened since the night before, even though we had eaten and chatted together about her tooth being pulled the day before at the dentist. She had taken vitamins and headache medicine. She had no recall of a headache, or how she was dressed, and why should would be in bed, fully dressed at this later afternoon hour. She felt dizzy, weak, and understandably - completely frightened of what was happening to her.

All I could do was hold on to her tightly and tell her that I'm here and that both us girls (my sister and I ) were here for her and would help her find out what is going on , and that it will be ok. She clung on to me as if I was the only thing that was keeping her from floating away - she just wept.

She was willing to seek additional help - and this is a first.


Now....will she remember this tomorrow???